Kaia’s story

I was 9 when my dad was diagnosed with bowel cancer. I didn’t quite understand what it was and my parents didn’t share with me the entire process due to my young age.

Countless trips to the hospital and surgeries.

In April 2020, when I was 11, my dad passed away. It was in the middle of covid restrictions and even visiting him before his death was so difficult. After he passed I felt this massive weight in my chest everytime I thought about him.

It was extremely hard to digest and to see everyone happy with their dads. I thought it would never end. It’s been 5 years now since he passed away and while my life has gotten much easier, I still struggle daily.

I often worry about only being able to remember him when he was sick and unrecognisable. Our lives have definitely changed drastically but in ways I appreciate life more due to the grief I faced.

I have a few methods I use to help get through it. I keep his fragrance that he wore with me in my room, I keep an album in my photos of just him to look at when im upset, and I have developed a google doc of all my memories with him so I don’t forget.

It doesn’t get easier, but I have found strength in honouring him in everything that I do, and I will continue to do so.